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So are poop particles contaminating your bathroom?

Maybe it’s not something you really ever thought about, i never did until a few days ago.

I had been taking a morning no 2 while browsing emails, eliminating spam, i finished up as you do, flushed the chain and washed my hands, dried my hands, picked up my phone off the corner of the sink next to where i had just sat and proceeded to leave the bathroom with a new found spring in my step, ‘i needed that” i thought to myself, but then a wave of hot air stopped me in my stride, “Have you just taken a shit!’ The wife screamed, jeezus i thought, tell the entire population of anonymous worldwide why don’t you, yes i replied what are you shouting for, i was in a good place for a second before you told the world i had just laid a banging turd. “Well it stinks”, she replied, “ok ok” i said, “everyone does them and lets be honest your own never smell as bad as someone else’s”,

Then she hit me with another sharp left, “have you just taken a shit while on the phone?” Err yeh i was just checking emails’ i said, why? “Errrrrr” she said “that’s disgusting!” “Why’s it disgusting, I didn’t touch any shit and i washed my hands after’ i argued, “doesn’t matter she said “when you take a shit, tiny poop particles float into the air contaminating everything with fecal matter , your phone is now covered in shit and you’ll put it to your face and touch something else with your shitty hands and spread the shit everywhere you go, jim you really are disgusting’.

Poop Particles

I must say at 8am in the morning this was all too much, i had only checked a few emails and she was neigh on blaming me for spreading germs to the worlds population whilst masquerading as some sort of poop particles bogey man, it hit deep, i was hurt, destroyed, i felt dirty, abused with shame, so i did what i always do in a situation such as this, i fucking googled it!

The solution is simple, so flip the page and i will explain the poop particles elimination fix.